I’m making roast beef tonight A huge chunk of beef is being popped into my oven tonight And now I have sex on my mind I never buy beef…to cook…on my own I don’t even know if this chunk of beef is meant to be the roasting kind And am I roasting beef if I’ve put it in the oven on “bake”? And what am I going to do with all this beef?! I want to invite you over for dinner Nothing formal…just needing assistance In consuming this roasted baked beef But I refuse to be the first to reach out I’m working on giving space like I promised Not offering my time and energy When it is not sought out And these onions are burning my eyes And now I’m crying into the potatoes And I miss you
A slow leak Another damn nail in the tire Didn’t notice until last night And now the tire is completely flat That tire I’m talking about? It’s me Completely drained of air Air - my power. My drive. My self-worth Leaked slowly out of me over the last month And it took becoming completely deflated Before I could finally take notice So now, it’s once again, time to problem solve Do I continue to reinflate this punctured tire Day after day Or do I remove the tire, roll it over to my repair guy, and get the damn hole fixed
“How did you ring in the New Year?” The question made me pause A warm, red blush, filled my cheeks “Sober” was my go-to answer One word with a lot of meaning and pride Describing all the turmoil, awakenings, beauty and darkness of the last year And although that is a correct answer It is not the whole “In orgasm”. “Sober, alone and cumming” That’s more like it Self-love at it’s finest, in the years finest hour While fireworks were being set off outside I experienced my own internal show People yelling and banging pots and pans While I muffled my own voice into my pillow And then I sat outside Listening to the continuing cacophony A trumpet trying pitifully to hit some high notes And I giggled, I smiled, and I felt A sense of pure contentment and gratitude Sober, alone, and happy
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